I am not entirely sure where all the controversy came from or when we all became some sensitive to things that a simple but popular British Tea Cookie stirs up trouble at school. Alas, it has.
Lance got in the car a couple of weeks ago and said that his pencil box was breaking and he needed a new one. He asked if he could have a bigger one because the one that he had was a little too small. I said, “yes, but it would have to wait a few days because I did not have time to get it right now.” We are still in the heat of getting the house ready for sell after all. It was busy and it was a low priority.
Fast forward about a week. It was crunch time.
Our living room looked like this. Lance was telling me that his pencil box was now officially broken and he needed a new one. We had this monumental task of packing what we officially dubbed the “rat’s nest.” This is the pile of stuff that came out of other rooms and got dumped in the living room so we could pack it and deal with it. Mostly so I could paint the other rooms. We still had to finish things in the house. We had deadlines.
Buying a new pencil box was the last thing on my mind and my priorities. Unfortunately, Lance was still a priority.
Fortunately, after taking 5 minutes and seeing this metal tin in the pile on the living room floor several times. I asked Ben what he planned on doing with it. It was purely decorative. We brought it back from our trip to London.
I thought Lance would really enjoy it. It was the perfect size, but most importantly it was durable!
The problem? There were not any. At least I did not think so.
Then he came home from school and said that his teacher was offended by the word on top of his new pencil box.
What?!.
His new found pencil box looks like a British Tea Biscuit. How can it possibly be offensive except to anyone but uncultured swine is my first thought. Evidently we let uncultured swine teach our fifth graders at Blackshear Elementary in Klein ISD. I just let it slide. I told Lance that there was nothing wrong with his pencil box. There was nothing wrong with it. I told him that his teacher needed to discuss it with me.
Then yesterday he came home from school and said that he could no longer use the pencil box because the principal says so.
What?!.
Immediately my mind jumps back to this image of alcoholic, bar hoping, uncultured swine. Maybe it should not. Maybe I am the crazy one here? Come on people, this is a fifth grader’s pencil box. It looks like a chocolate cookie!
Lance even tried to explain to his teacher what it was but she was not having any of it. I am guessing this is how it escalated to the principal’s office.
I am sure that I escalated it further this morning when I walked right into the front office at school drop-off time and demanded to see the principal or vice principal. I did not care which. It was stopping today. The stupidity was stopping right there!
I even read the student handbook last night and there is nothing in the handbook that states that he cannot have it. Nothing! I do not understand this madness. It is pure crazy I tell you.
All because his teacher was offended by the word on top of his pencil box.
What was the word on top?
BOURBON
Yes, you read that right. We are talking about a metal decorative storage tin that looks like a British Tea Biscuit called a Bourbon. We are not talking about the alcoholic drink here, we are talking about a chocolate delicacy. Two chocolate cookies (or biscuits) with chocolate cream between them.
In America, it would be the equivalent of a chocolate Oreo. Yes folks, Lance’s teacher got her knickers in a wad over the equivalent of a chocolate Oreo. Let me get her some milk! I would rather offer her some Starbuck’s as that might be more her cup of tea…but I am just flabbergasted that we even had to have this conversation in the first place.
The best part? These things were created by a German from what I have discovered. They were named after the French family, the Bourbon family. Just how cultural and rich do you want it to be? It isn’t about the alcohol at all. Not an ounce of liquor in them!
Now is it high noon yet?
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