I intend to get back into blogging regularly – again – but there are just not enough hours in the day. I am not skilled enough to efficiently manage and shuffle all of my hours. I have come to accept that I am only one person and sometimes you have to give up on things for your sanity. They call all these daily demands stress and while stress management is encouraged, it is not always achieved. My doctor likes to tell me to reduce my stress, but she also understands that is not possible all of the time.
A lot has happened since the last big post/update I made here. I will not go into all of that – in detail. There is a lot of stress involved in most of it. I am declaring that stress can be good and bad, but it does not change the impact on the body. It is all a matter of perspective and mindset. When the body is required to run at full speed ahead regardless of the purpose or reason, it is still a stressor. Sometimes you cannot slow down the fan that keeps slinging the demands around.
I will not delve deeply into some of these past events because I am not ready to open up emotionally about some of them. Period. I will get there at some point, but that is not today. Let me just preface the rest of this post by saying that a lot has happened in the past year – good and bad. I am still alive. I am still here. I am still me, just an altered version of me.
Good Intentions
The best-paved roads of intentions crumble and fall apart.
When I started posting gardening posts early last year, I had every intention of continuing the efforts. I have a ton of posts in draft format that I will eventually get around to finishing, editing, and posting. These are still valid and serve the purpose I want them to. That is not my focal point for this post and unfortunately for those who enjoy reading about my gardening adventures over on Facebook, it will not be something that I finish in the next couple of months. That is me accepting my limitations.
I intend to get back on the journaling train and I have largely used my blog as a journal over the years. That is what I want to do. It may just take a few modifications as I get back into the practice. I do not think that I will strive for daily blogging again. It is not realistic for me right now. However, I do know that making a record of your daily activities does help you find a center to redirect your actions around. For me, the blog has been an accountability partner of sorts. In other ways, it has been a place to just dump the millions of ideas in my head and make them tangible.
Managing school-related stress
When I decided to attempt finishing my Bachelor’s degree – again – in 2018, I did not realize just how big of a challenge this would be in my life. Do not get me wrong, I love learning and it was well past time for me to check that box on my list of life’s bucket list, but I figured I could and would pace myself slowly enough that it would just happen slowly over time.
That is not the case!
Even taking 1-2 classes per semester has been stressful. It is not always the topic of study. In most cases, it has not been the topic at all. I know that I do not love accounting – at all. It has been things far outside of my realm of control related to schooling and the educational institution of choice. I have had great experiences at BYU-Idaho, but it is not perfect.
The desire to finish does not negate the stress created by the process. Knowing you have stress does not mean you know how to manage or reduce it. When the stress changes, it does not mean existing stress management techniques work the same.
Life does not stop happening. It slowed down my pace in 2020. Things beyond my control. Since January 2024, it has increased forward momentum. Why? So close…
Reducing school-related stress
Every couple of semesters I review what I am working on, how it fits with longer-term goals and focus, and what I have left to finish based on the degree plan and institutional changes. After starting the Winter 2024 semester in January, I was communicating with my academic advisor. I do not always get the same one, but I got lucky this round of interactions.
This semester marked the completion of two things.
The question: What does it take to graduate with that Bachelor’s degree?
Per my calculations and based on the rate I was finishing courses, I would graduate in April 2025. It was still a long way off, but it was obtainable. I could do that.
I am not going to lie, burnout was starting to set in. I have been at “senior” level student status since the day I enrolled at BYU-Idaho. Senioritis was catching up to me quickly. Burnout is real!
My progress
At this point, I had one certificate to finish and however many upper-division credits that were not completed in the remaining courses required for this certificate. I was working on the Basic Accounting Certificate. I discovered early on that I do not love accounting. It is the lowest grade I have received at BYU-Idaho and I had to work extremely hard to get that 94. I tried to like it, but I just could not. The thought of finishing this certificate increased my need for stress management. If I went this route, it would be 2 classes to complete it and another 5 upper-division credits to graduate.
This introduced an interesting problem – changing that certificate. At BYU-Idaho, the degrees are a certificate first structured, meaning these certificates build the foundation and course of study resulting in a degree in the end. The purpose is to make you employable faster with job-focused certificates. That is not open for debate because I have no control over that except to pay an incredibly higher price tag to finish the bachelor’s degree that has been almost 30 years in the making.
I considered changing this to the Entrepreneurship Certificate. This would mean 4 classes plus 8 upper-division credits to complete. I was stuck on this decision because the goal was to graduate, not to continue moving the goalpost. I wanted the touchdown.
Either way, I was still looking for upper-division credits with no prerequisites to complete my degree. While I am not afraid of the challenge of the upper-division courses, it does increase my need for stress management due to the heavier workload and more expectations.
The Race to Graduation
After a couple of Zoom meetings and email exchanges with my academic advisor, an alternative became available. At this point, I already had over 200 credits to my name on record at BYU-Idaho. Fortunately, my academic advisor recognized the situation and dug deeper into my academic records.
What came next changed things!
I was offered a certificate waiver. That means instead of the 3 required certificates, I would only need to complete 2 certificates. I would still be required to have the required number of credits for the degree (which I already had) and complete all of the upper-division credits.
I took the waiver.
This left me with 8 upper-division credits. That is all! At this point, we were 2 weeks out from the start of the second block (half semester) of the 14-week semester. I scrambled to register for an upper-division course. The availability of those with no prerequisites has become slimmer over the years so I had to take what I could get.
If I could get into that course during the second block of the Winter 2024 semester (January to April) and take the remaining upper-division credits during the Spring 2024 semester (April to July), I would graduate at the end of Spring 2024. This is 1 year early!
When reduction is not possible and enduring stress management
So here I am…finishing my last courses for my Bachelor’s degree – finally!
I am in my second higher courseload semester and with everything that has happened since August 2023, the burnout is increasing. Stress management is enduring. Sometimes it is not possible to reduce it, you just have to ride it out until the end.
We are almost down to 1 month to go. The flights to Salt Lake City, Utah have been booked. The hotels in Salt Lake City and Rexburg, Idaho are booked. The rental car to drive from Salt Lake City to Rexburg has been reserved for pickup. My cap and gown have arrived! It is almost here.
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